Brief Comments on Riyaadh al-Saaliheen #111

We all have that one friend:

بسم الله والحمد لله والصلاة والسلام على رسول الله ، وبعد

Once in a while we come across a friend or a relative who with his continuous requests / asking / calling puts us in a spot where we cannot refuse and have to comply with their request.

We should be careful not to make abrupt requests which will cause discomfort, annoyance or embarrassment to the one being requested. Sometimes the requester will not be offended if his request is denied; but such abrupt requests tend to shift the weight of the responsibility / blame upon the one being requested, where they sometimes feel cornered into doing it.

Shaikh Ibn al-`Uthaymeen رحمه الله said:

❝And it is known that if someone were to give you a gift or gave you something out of modesty and bashfulness, then you should not accept it from him, because this is like he was impelled to do it. This is why the scholars’ رحمهم الله have said: it is forbidden for you to accept a gift from a person if you know that he is giving it to you only out of modesty or bashfulness.

Similarly, if you were to pass by a house and its owner invites you in, and you know that he did this out of modesty and bashfulness, then you should not enter it because this is like the one who did it out coercion. This is from the etiquette of attending the gathering, which the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم legislated upon his Ummah that one should not make his brother get up from his place do that he can occupy it.❞

[Sharh Riyaadh al-Saaliheen (4/350-351)]