Walking a fine line between getting angry and being harsh

بسم الله والحمد لله والصلاة والسلام على رسول الله ، وبعد

Getting angry when something wrong is done is from a natural disposition, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم used to get angry when the rights of Allaah were violated. As `Aaishah رضي الله عنها said:

مَا انْتَقَمَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ لِنَفْسِهِ فِي شَيْءٍ يُؤْتَى إِلَيْهِ حَتَّى يُنْتَهَكَ مِنْ حُرُمَاتِ اللَّهِ، فَيَنْتَقِمَ لِلَّهِ

❝The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم never took revenge for his own self in the matters presented to him except when the Hurumaat (limits set by) Allaah are violated, in which case he would take revenge.❞ [Saheeh al-Bukhaaree (3560, 6126, 6786, 6853) and Saheeh Muslim (5752)]

But being harsh and chasing someone away from the truth is not from the Deen rather it is a very bad thing to do as the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:

يَا أَيُّهَا النَّاسُ، إِنَّ مِنْكُمْ مُنَفِّرِينَ

❝O people! Some of you make others dislike (the good deeds).❞ [Saheeh al-Bukhaaree (90, 702, 704, 6110, 7159) and Saheeh Muslim (940)]

And he صلى الله عليه وسلم also said:

يَسِّرُوا وَلاَ تُعَسِّرُوا، وَبَشِّرُوا، وَلاَ تُنَفِّرُوا

❝Make things easy and do not make things difficult. Give glad tidings and do not make them run away.❞ [Saheeh al-Bukhaaree (69, 6125) and Saheeh Muslim (4297, 4300)]

And when he صلى الله عليه وسلم sent Mu`aadh and Abu Moosaa رضي الله عنهما to Yemen, he صلى الله عليه وسلم instructed them saying:

يَسِّرَا وَلاَ تُعَسِّرَا، وَبَشِّرَا وَلاَ تُنَفِّرَا، وَتَطَاوَعَا وَلاَ تَخْتَلِفَا

❝Both of you should show leniency (to the people); don't be hard upon them; give them glad tidings (of Divine favors in this world and the Hereafter) ; and do not create aversion. Work in collaboration and don't be divided.❞ [Saheeh al-Bukhaaree (3038, 4341, 4344, 6124, 7172) and Saheeh Muslim (4298, 4961)]

Harshness is never a solution. Rather one should deal with kindness and forgiveness as Allaah تعالى mentioned about Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم:

﴿فَبِمَا رَحْمَةٍ مِّنَ اللَّـهِ لِنتَ لَهُمْ ۖ وَلَوْ كُنتَ فَظًّا غَلِيظَ الْقَلْبِ لَانفَضُّوا مِنْ حَوْلِكَ ۖفَاعْفُ عَنْهُمْ وَاسْتَغْفِرْ لَهُمْ وَشَاوِرْهُمْ فِي الْأَمْرِ ۖ فَإِذَا عَزَمْتَ فَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى اللَّـهِ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّـهَ يُحِبُّ الْمُتَوَكِّلِينَ﴾

❝{And by the Mercy of Allaah, you (O Muhammad) dealt with them GENTLY. And had you been SEVERE and HARSH-HEARTED, they would have broken away from about you; so pass over (their faults), and ask (Allaah's) FORGIVENESS for them; and consult them in the affairs. Then when you have taken a decision, put your trust in Allaah, certainly, Allaah loves those who put their trust (in Him)}❞ [Surah aal-`Imraan (3): 159]

Allaah sent the Prophets, Moosaa and Haaroon, to Fir`aoun, instructing them to be gentle with him:

﴿اذْهَبَا إِلَىٰ فِرْعَوْنَ إِنَّهُ طَغَىٰ * فَقُولَا لَهُ قَوْلًا لَّيِّنًا لَّعَلَّهُ يَتَذَكَّرُ أَوْ يَخْشَىٰ﴾

❝{“Go, both of you, to Fir`aun (Pharaoh), verily, he has transgressed (all bounds in disbelief and disobedience and behaved as an arrogant and as a tyrant), And speak to him MILDLY, perhaps he may accept admonition or fear Allaah.”}❞ [Surah Taha (20): 43-44]

Fir`aun claimed godhood for himself, yet Allaah instructed that he should be dealt with gentleness; perhaps he may listen and accept the truth. So is it not important that we treat our brothers and sisters with more gentleness, kindness and forgiveness?!

Moreover, Shaikh Ibn Baaz said that this is a time for gentleness; Shaikh `Abdul Mohsin al-`Abbaad addressed this issue; Shaikh Rabee` spoke against the harshness which is found is some of the brothers and sisters.

So from all this we learn is that when some people behave rudely, it shows a sign of defect in them, it shows where they are lacking, it shows that they themselves need to learn good manners before opening their mouth. It shows that they themselves have not grasped the true meaning of Salafiyyah, because they are going against the teachings of the Qur’aan, the teachings of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and the teachings of the scholars.

Did we not read the saying of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم: ❝None of you truly believe till he likes for his brother what he likes for himself❞?!

Did we not read the saying of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم: ❝A Mu’min (believer) to another Mu’min is like a brick wall, supporting each other❞?!

May Allaah unite us upon Truth and cleanse our hearts and make them soft.